Leaving your Church in hopes of finding Greener Pastures?

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Why do you want to leave your church family? There are many things that can cause a person to consider leaving a church... some good and some not so good. Let’s consider a few of these and see if any justify leaving a church.

You may be in a situation where the Lord may be tugging at you to “step over into Macedonia” to help grow another congregation. Bringing your ministry and encouragement to another church family is the best reason to leave your church. Maybe you’re experiencing "spiritual malnutrition” at your present church. Your current fellowship is actually inhibiting your spiritual well-being and growth. This also can be a justifiable reason for leaving. However, many people leave a church simply because they are disinterested, dissatisfied, frustrated or simply feel they can find some place better. In your mind these may feel like justified and valid reasons for leaving, but are they?

It has been said... “you have to suffer as much from the church as you do for it.” If you find yourself right now... caught in the crossfire of church conflict, are you considering giving up on church entirely? There is a growing disillusionment among Christians with the concept of going to church. Bad experiences and interpersonal conflicts have left a bitter taste about organized assemblies... church. These believers will often give up entirely on the practice of being part of a local church. The church is essential in the mission of God. Please read through previous articles on this BLOG and you will better understand the importance of church in our commitment to Christ. We can’t live “in Christ” without being an active participant in a body of believers.

Church is where we learn how to live life the way God wants us to, among and with each other. We learn patience, mercy, forgiveness, tolerance. Church gives us the place to develop these attributes, doing it alongside each other. Outside of Christ, our mistakes are just mistakes. But in the church, we have hope that our mistakes will be transformed into beneficial experiences... resulting in spiritual growth.

Christians can be annoying, irritating, overbearing, self-centered and misguided. You will always find some kind of discontent and sin in a family of believers. Still, we are commanded to have fellowship within the Body of Christ. It’s not an option... it’s a command from the founder of the Church... Jesus Christ.

If you are contemplating leaving your church, then you no doubt have entertained the notion that you don’t need church at all. All you need is God. How peaceful it would be to close off from everyone who causes you pain, read your Bible, pray and just commune with God. Let me escape from all that “churchified” business. Have you entertained those thoughts? Going solo isn’t an option. Involvement with our “brothers and sisters in Christ” with the help of the Holy Spirit, is the only way we can be truly “in harmony with Christ”. It’s not easy, but it is His plan for us... to be together, in fellowship, struggling together, working out our salvation... together.

It helps to remember, it is our humanity and living in a fallen–dying world that causes many of the problems we experience in fellowship. In a church family, like the diversity of humanity, there are many different ways for people to express their love for Jesus. My way is different than yours. Your way is different from mine. Not better or worse, just different. God accepts everybody in His family of believers. We can do no less.

It’s easy to forget that people in the church are at different levels of maturity, both naturally and spiritually. Our life experiences also affect how we interact with others. Growth is a process, which takes time and patience. Turn the other cheek... extend grace to those who today are rough around the edges.

There will be strife in a church, accept that as a reality of this fallen world. Could there be a silver lining in what for many today is a very frustrating experience? The answer is Yes. All the things that bother us about church and one another, can be overcome by shifting our focus to Jesus, the Cross, His promises, and our eternal future. When the going gets rough, keep your eyes on Jesus. As long as you do that, you won’t have time to criticize others, or get caught up in the drama.

What does the Bible teach us about being together? It's so important to really understand the Lord's teachings about the body of Christ and what the Bible says about the asembly of believers and being connected to one another.

The Bible tells us to meet together as believers and to encourage one another.
Hebrews 10:25 (NIV) Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. The Bible instructs us to be in relationship with other believers, even though others may not think that’s important. If we are part of Christ's body, we will recognize our need to fit into the body of believers. The church is the place where we come together to encourage one another as members of Christ's body. Together we fulfill an important purpose on the Earth, where Christians are under constant scrutiny by the world.

As members of the body of Christ, we belong to each other.
Romans 12:5... so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others.
It is actually for our own good that God want us in fellowship with other believers. We need each other to “grow up” in the faith, to learn to serve, to love one another, and to practice forgiveness. Though we are individuals, with uniques personalities and needs... we still belong to one another. God expects us to care for and share with one another.

Leaving is Risky business
When you decide to give up on attending church, or move to another church because of problems what's at risk? Well, to put it in a nutshell: the unity of the body, your own spiritual growth, protection and blessing are all at risk when you' disconnect from the body of Christ.

Christ's body is made of many parts, yet it is still one unified entity.
1 Corinthians 12:12; 14-23 The body is a unit, though it is made up of many parts; and though all its parts are many, they form one body. So it is with Christ.

1 Corinthians 12:27 Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it. Unity in the body of Christ does not mean total conformity and uniformity. Although maintaining unity in the body is very important, it is also vital to value the unique qualities that make each of us an individual "part" of the body. Sometimes it’s the “individuality” of people that irritates us. We must learn to appreciate the diversity and individuality of all believers. This makes for a healthy church body, when we remember that Christ is our common denominator. He makes us one.

Spiritual Growth
We develop the character of Christ through bearing with one another in the body of Christ.
Ephesians 4:2 Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. How else will we grow spiritually unless we interact with other believers? Interaction... “bearing with one another” means dealing with the problems and rough spots common among imperfect people. Critical to our spiritual growth and eternal salvation are the qualities of humility, gentleness and patience, and developing the character of Christ. Having this mind and these qualities facilitiates our relationships within the body of Christ. Get past yourself, your expectations, your personal agenda and live your life “completely humble and gentle”. Jesus never said nor did he promise that our brotherhood would will be easy, or fellowhip a perfect experience. It’s work, hard work. For some of us, more work than we are willing to invest.

In the body of Christ we exercise our spiritual gifts to serve and minister to one another. 1 Peter 4:10 Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms.

We encourage one another. 1 Thessalonians 5:11 Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.

We help each other through troubled times and the rough periods we all experience in life. James 5:16 Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.

We will discover a satisfying sense of fulfillment when we consistently carry out our purpose in the body of Christ. We are the ones who miss out on all the blessings of God and the gifts of our "family members," if we choose not to be a part of Christ's body.

Protection & Blessing
Our leaders in the body of Christ provide spiritual protection, guidance and security. 1 Peter 5:1-4 To the elders among you, I appeal as a fellow elder ... Be shepherds of God's flock that is under your care, serving as overseers—not because you must, but because you are willing, as God wants you to be; not greedy for money, but eager to serve; not lording it over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock.

Hebrews 13:17 Obey your leaders and submit to their authority. They keep watch over you as men who must give an account. Obey them so that their work will be a joy, not a burden, for that would be of no advantage to you.

God has placed us into the body of Christ for our own protection and blessing. Just like every earthly family, it's not always fun. We don't always have warm and fuzzy feelings in the body. There will be difficult times as we grow together as a spiritual family, but there are also blessings that we will never experience unless we become relational and connected in the body of Christ.

What can you do?
Before making a decision about changing your church, it’s essential to pray about your situation and seek the Lord’s leading (Prov. 3:6). This takes time and patience. Warning... don’t be deceived by your own ability to “answer your own prayers” according to your own desires.

Ask yourself these questions to evaluate your current church environment: Is your church scripturally and doctrinally sound? Is your church reasonably stable and loving? Does your church haves godly, moral leadership, who care for the flock? Is your church doing its best to exalt Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord? If your church making a reasonable effort to minister to you and your family? If you can answer “yes” to these questions... then hang in there and be faithful in your present fellowship.

If you’re still unhappy with such a church, it’s very likely that the problem isn’t the church. It's your problem. Churches are imperfect... full of imperfect people. Don’t let other people's mistakes and short comings keep you from a genuine relationship with God and all the blessings he has planned for you as you fulfill your role within His body.

Spend more time looking in your mirror for your flaws and not the flaws of others. Do this and you will begin to see the church more clearly and your brothers and sisters “in Christ” with the love and understanding that only comes from Christ.