The Challenge of Sincere, Honest Submission to God

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Sincere honest-hearted submission to God?  This is a hard thing for any Christian that believes they’re on track with God, to accept that they might not be so “on track”.  Remember, God does not “beat the world” out of us... although sometimes I think that would be a welcomed solution and relieve us of trying to do it ourselves. Submission and total unqualified commitment to God... is our choice.  A choice we must make without interference from God.    

Submission can be deceptive.  Even thought our heart tells us we deeply desire to submit to God in every way, and be obedient to every aspect of His expectations for our living a submitted and committed Christian life... our fallen nature persuades us to posture in the same deceptive and defiant way we did before we came to know Christ.  We deceive ourselves in the hopes that somehow God is going to grant us an “exception” because we’re sinful creates.  

We want everything the kingdom of God has to offer. We want to have a secure sense of God's presence in our lives, we want all our prayers to be answered, we want to "feel close" to Jesus, we want to flourish in the riches of God's glory—we want it all. 

But we are unwilling to give up everything for it. Many times through the travails of our lives we are stumbled and confronted by the things we treasure.  Our ingrained habits, pleasures of the world, carnal attitudes, or just believing we’re 'more right' than others.  All these things delude us into believing that we can travel the narrow road with our own road map.  We seem unwilling to offer navigational control to Christ.  Sometimes, what He asks of us seems too hard to do and sustain in our lives.  But until we can fully submit ourselves to God's will, our participation in God's kingdom and His rich blessings will be limited.  

Like sin, which is an inside-out process born within us... so is our sustaining submission to God.  Submission is inside-out... born in a transforming heart that is manifested in practical everyday Christian living experiences exhibited in positive and loving interactions among brothers and sisters.  Submission, like sin, is our choice... totally and completely.

Let me illustrate our unconscious resistance to submission with a practical perspective that impacts Christian brotherhood every single day... extending and accepting forgiveness.  You know, forgiving another Christian who has deeply hurt you, thereby hopefully restoring your relationship.   Learning to "forgive and be forgiven" is one of the attributes of total submission to God.

Maybe you’ll see yourself in this scenario... maybe you’ve been in a similar situation or find yourself struggling in one right now.  

Someone or maybe several people in your congregation said something or did something to you that really hurt you. You were attacked unfairly.  It might even have caused you to leave that fellowship because the hurt and pain were just to great to deal with.  You felt embarrassed, demoralized, shamed.  Untrue things were said about you!  No matter how hard you tried to find a hearing and understanding ear, no one seemed to care about your feelings.  No one did much if anything to help resolve the problem.   You felt trapped, cornered by the accusations of people you trusted as brothers and sisters in Christ.  In your mind you were the victim of a vicious attack and for no justifiable reason that you could think of.  Maybe it was misunderstandings. Or maybe it was “your style” being attacked. You’re too reserved, or to assertive, or to aggressive, or to outspoken, or maybe you're just the quintessential "difficult person"... you’re not sure.  But you don’t think what happened to you is your fault.  In your mind, fault rests on the shoulder of your attackers.  What do you do?  Nothing seems to work, especially the Biblical admonishment to “go to your brother”...(Matthew 18:15).   You’ve tried that... it’s not working.  That failure alone stuns and disheartens you.  It breaks your spirit.  So... you fold your tent, pack your bags and leave the church.  Spiritual life really changes for you and your family.

Time passes.  You’re hopeful that someone might figure out, now that you and your family are noticeably absent from the church family, what happened and come to you with a big “sincere sorry”, I was wrong... we were wrong... please forgive me... please forgive us.  More time passes... nothing happens.  No one comes knocking on your door.  Your mind begins to form all kinds of rationalizations to explain the lack of action on the part of those “brothers” who by this point in time your mind is pretty well convinced brutalized you and your family!  And by people of Christ no less!

Time becomes months... then years.  Still no one comes.  Was I really as bad as they said I was?  I must have been, since they seem very happy that I am gone!  It is as if I am dead to them.  And they call themselves Christians!  

Then one day.... someone close to you says... “you should go to them and seek their forgiveness.  At least try and clear the air”.  Immediately you become defensive.  Why me?  Why should I seek forgiveness for things I didn’t do?  Why not them?  Let them come to me... they're in the wrong... they need to take the initiative and fix this mess, not me!  

Do you have any idea how hard that is to do?  Any clue?  If you’ve experienced a similar situation in your Christian life then you know very well how difficult it is to accept responsibility for the “wrongs did to you” by others.  After all, whatever you do or say in seeking restoration of relationships... they’ll still have the edge won’t they?    They might even be willing to accept your overture, but then tell you “the past is in the past” and I don’t want to discuss anything about the past.  How convenient for them!  You‘ve suffered for months and maybe years.  Your family has suffered untold emotional and spiritual damage... but oh no, let’s not discuss anything you did to me because you might feel guilty about what you did to me.  We surely wouldn’t want that!   

I think you get the idea.  The human mind can be and often is very deceptive –– able to convince you of all sorts of awful things about yourself and your brothers in Christ.  A scenario just like the aforementioned is being lived out by many Christian brothers and sisters right now, throughout God’s Church.  Sadly, many of these situations will never be resolved.   

Forgiveness is one of the superlatives of submission to God.  Without mastering the art of forgiveness, we can never hope to find true peace among brothers and we most certainly will stunt our spiritual growth and maturity in Christ.  

BUT, forgiveness is hard to do because the very concept is foreign to the fallen soul.  Our fallen world says we should square the decks, even the playing field, pursue the win-win for everyone.  That feeling is deeply ingrained in us and controlled by our sinful nature.  The natural tendency of our spirit is to say... I DON’T WANT TO COME OUT ON THE SHORT END OF FORGIVENESS!!!  NO WAY!!!   I WANT THE OTHER GUY TO ADMIT HE WAS WRONG... THAT SEEMS FAIR... DOESN’T IT?  He caused my pain and suffering... it only seems fair and just... isn’t it?    Maybe to us... but NOT to God.

Maybe you were unfairly attacked.  Maybe you are completely guiltless in any of the circumstances that caused the break of fellowship with your “former” congregation.  You have suffered greatly at the hand of your Christian brothers and sisters you trusted.  

Maybe no one who hurt you sees or understands what they have done to you.   And even if they have a slight inkling of your pain, they probably still think you’re in the wrong.  Maybe they’re really glad you left the church!  As you've tried to deal with the pain, maybe everything you’ve hypothesized, surmised and speculated about, everything they did to you, is dead on accurate.  

So what if you are the victim? You really can’t use that bit of logic to defend your position with God of  “no action”, can you?  Don’t you just hate it when simple “logic and reasoning”  gets in the way of nurturing your treasured wounds?  You’ve been hoping, anticipating, waiting for someone to approach you, but nothing has happened. You’ve been daydreaming that those who hurt you are thinking about you and worried about you. They must be looking for every opportunity to “reach out” to you. That is clearly not so. Christians expect that if apologies are justifiably due, then the offender will go above and beyond to seek you out and make things right. You are hopeful that apologies extended and accepted, especially among Christians. will make everything wonderful again.  That is an unrealistic expectation, even for Christians.  

Here’s a simple resolution to this “forgiveness dilemma” that oppresses you.  First... you can’t hide from it... it’s part of living among and serving with Gods people.  Jesus said we are to forgive our brothers endlessly and continually.  Second...  If you want the full measure of God working in your life, then you have to be the person to reach out and try and repair the bridge to restoration.  Third... lower your expectations to "zero" and clear the air with your brother.  

It might not be anything more than finding an opportunity to cross paths in a casual non-confrontational setting. Kindness, civility and a gentle "how are you these days"... "I've missed you brother"... is good enough to start the journey of forgiveness. Small beginnings can lead to a God-powered restoration of the soul and spirit among brothers.

Don't worry about what the other person might or might not do or say.  You are holding the KEY... unlock the door.   Let God reenter the hearts of everyone involved in causing your pain and suffering and see what happens.  Who can be hurt by that?  Certainly not you!