If you don't take care of Yourself…..no one else will. Say no to others and yes to Yourself. When you give to others, it reduces the amount of resources you have left for Yourself. It’s all about balancing selfishness with selflessness. Always remember... YOU first.
I got your attention, didn’t I? So... what do we have here... self-centered deeply flawed worldly thinking. While it may be flawed... it is a very popular and alluring philosophy of the world.
Can you say “no” to yourself? What about spending money? What are the priorities in your life for spending your money? Where does it go? Can you walk through the local Mall without dropping a few hundred bucks on things you don’t really need? We lust after many things... a new car... a boat... the time-share condo... luxury vacations... latest fashions... jewelry... anything and everything to make us feel good. Things, stuff, pursuits, become like gods to us. I once heard someone give this advice... “hey, when you’re down and feeling sad, go out and buy yourself something nice and you’ll feel better.”
How about over-indulging in food and drink...over-eating? Can you back away from the dinner table when your body signals that your hunger is satisfied, or do you keep shoveling it in? If you’re looking in the mirror and complaining about your weight, then maybe you’re not saying saying no often enough.
Followers of Christ, must become experts” at saying “no” to things that distract us and deflect our time and attention away from the direction our lives must take to please God. Jesus provided a large dose of “shock therapy” on the subject of saying “no” for his followers, as He journeyed to the cross. In a nutshell, here’s what He said...
Deny yourself, carry your cross, and be willing to give your life for Me. (Matt. 16:24,25; Mark 8:34,35; Luke 9:23,24) Harsh words... tough to hear and hard to understand.
What did Jesus mean when He said... to be His disciples, we must deny ourselves, take up our cross, and give our lives for Him? In the context of these passages, Jesus had been predicting His death. Peter rebuked Him, and Jesus responded to Peter. Then Jesus made these profound statements... in effect, raising the bar... the standard required to be a true follower.
What does it mean to “deny ones self”? Denying self requires us to give up anything that we would want that would hinder our doing the will of God. This does not mean that if we want or need something, it is necessarily a wrong desire. It means we must take our wants and desires down from the high places in our lives and place Jesus and His will at the center of all we think, want and do. It’s a matter of leadership in your life. Do you control you, or does Jesus control you? Jesus must become the governing power in your life. There is room in our lives for only one master (Matt. 6:19-24). If God is to rule in our lives, then our will must be made subservient to His. We must be willing to give up anything in our life in order to please God. (Rom. 12:1,2; Matt. 6:33; Luke 14:25-33; 2 Cor. 5:14,15)
Can you say No? The starting point in a genuine relationship with Jesus Christ is to "deny" ourselves. Do you want a deeper spiritual relationship with Jesus? It starts with making “you” and what you want the least, and Him and what He wants the most. It starts by saying "NO" to yourself. This is a complete denial of self in favor of Jesus. Peter had objected to Jesus dying. Jesus told Peter and His disciples simply that they must be willing to die to themselves in every way - including the real possibility of physical death. The early Christians did die to themselves... by torture, fire, and in the Roman Coliseum. Ask yourself... what are you willing to give up, to be an effective witness for Jesus? Are you willing to deny yourself the pursuits of pleasure, wealth and material possessions? Are you willing to put the Great Commission and the needs of widows and orphans... first... ahead of everything you want, everyday of your life? Denying Self... learning to say NO to yourself leads to a life of bearing one’s cross, another part of Jesus cryptic words. What does “bearing one’s cross” mean?
Let’s begin with what Jesus didn’t mean. Many people interpret “cross” as some burden they must carry in their lives, such as a strained relationship, a thankless job, a physical illness. With self-pitying pride, you often hear, “That’s my cross I have to bear.” Such an interpretation is not what Jesus meant when He said, “Take up your cross and follow Me.”
When Jesus carried His cross up Golgotha to be crucified, no one was thinking of the cross as symbolic of a burden to carry. To any person in the first-century, the cross meant one thing and one thing only... death by the most painful and humiliating means human beings could develop.
Two thousand years later, Christians view the cross as a cherished symbol of atonement, forgiveness, grace, and love. But in Jesus’ day, the cross represented nothing but torturous death. Because the Romans forced convicted criminals to carry their own crosses to the place of crucifixion, bearing a cross meant carrying their own execution device while facing ridicule along the way to death.
Therefore, “Take up your cross and follow Me” metaphorically means “dying to self” in order to follow Jesus. It’s a call to absolute surrender. Taking up your cross means... giving your whole life to God, as Jesus was about to give His life for all humanity. Certainly this involves bearing personal burdens, but it is much deeper than that. It is a total dedication of your life to Christ’s will and purpose, not yours. Your whole life is given over without conditions to His service. Following Him requires us to live our lives as He lived His life (I Pet. 2:21; Matt. 10:34,35; I Cor. 11:1).
The same passage as recorded by Luke adds frequency... "take up your cross daily" (Luke 9:23). Christians must give their lives to God every day. Daily renewal, recommitment, reaffirmation, submission. When you commit to Christ, it’s not about you anymore... it’s all about what you can do in willing obedience to Him. Whatever He wants with your life is what you must do with it. What you want no longer matters, you give yourself to Him, just as He gave Himself for us.
Each time Jesus commanded cross bearing, He issued a warning... “For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it. What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, and yet lose or forfeit his very self?” (Luke 9:24-25). Although the call to follow Jesus is tough and the requirements are very high, all of us can do it if we want to. The reward is matchless.
Following Jesus is easy when life runs smoothly. However, the quality and depth of our true commitment to Him is revealed during hardships and trials. Jesus assured us that trials will come to His followers (John 16:33). Discipleship demands sacrifice, and Jesus never hid that cost from anyone who would seek to become one of His followers.
Think hard on this harsh reality of commitment to Christ.... We are not following Jesus if we are not saying no to ourselves and being willing to suffer with Him. Jesus says it is not possible to really be one of His followers if you are not denying yourself, in favor of Him.
Are you Willing...?
If you wonder if you are ready to take up your cross, consider these questions: Are you willing to follow Jesus if it means losing some of your closest friends? Are you willing to follow Jesus if it means alienation from your family? Are you willing to follow Jesus if it means the loss of your reputation? Are you willing to follow Jesus if it means losing your job? Are you willing to follow Jesus if it means losing your life?
In some places of the world, these consequences are reality. But notice the questions are phrased, “Are you willing?” Following Jesus doesn’t necessarily mean all these things will happen to you, but are you willing to take up your cross, accepting that they might become your reality?
If ever there comes a point in your life where you are faced with a choice—Jesus or the comforts of this life—which will you choose?
