When we pray, God hears us. The Bible states in no uncertain terms that "this is the confidence we have in approaching God... he hears us" (1 John 5:14). When we pray, whether by spoken word or in quiet anguish, our prayers ascend unencumbered to God's presence. But that's not all that happens.
When we pray, God cares. What we attempt to convey is more important to him than we could possibly imagine. The Bible asserts this as well: "Let him [God] have all your worries and cares, for he is always thinking about you and watching everything that concerns you" (1 Peter 5:7). Notice the emphasis: God is concerned not simply with his grand plan but with our cares and concerns. When it comes to prayer, God's empathy knows no bounds.
But it is the Bible's third declaration that perplexes us. When we pray, God answers. The Bible is emphatic: there is no such thing as an unanswered prayer. "You say, 'He does not respond to people's complaints.' But God speaks again and again, though people do not recognize it" (Job 33:13-14 ).
Now you may be thinking, That isn't true. I specifically prayed for a new Red Corvette sports car, and it's not sitting in my driveway, so I know God doesn't answer every prayer. Or you may be recalling, "Once I prayed that I would get to work on time — that was it, no big deal, no sweat off God's brow — and I got a flat tire on my way to work... I was late.”
More seriously, you may resonate with C.S. Lewis's feelings after his wife passed away, or maybe the cryptic lyrics of Paul Simon’s song The Sounds of Silence. When you hear someone casually toss out that God answers every prayer, you say, "Listen, that's just not true. And I have the experience to prove it."
But the Bible doesn't back down when challenged on this. Scripture stands by the declaration that God hears, cares and responds. Always.
So what is happening with God's answer?
In our struggle with God's perceived silence we must take into account an idea that is often alien to our sensibilities: that a prayer was not answered in the way we wanted it answered or thought it should have been answered, doesn't mean that an answer did not come directly from God. God promises to answer every prayer; how he chooses to answer is his affair. Consider the following ways a clear response from God might be mistaken for silence.
No is usually Mistaken for Silence
The first is the most obvious. Sometimes God's answer is simply "No." What we ask for, no matter how well-intentioned, could be inappropriate, like a new Corvette. Do you really need one? I'm pretty sure God won't think you need one. Yet we often refuse to listen to God's no, insisting instead that God has yet to answer. It is often beyond our thinking to imagine that God would deny our requests.
Once Jesus and his followers were traveling to Jerusalem. One of the cities they journeyed through was Samaria, so some went ahead to arrange a place with local inhabitants for Jesus and the rest of the disciples to stay. What happened next is interesting.
The people there did not welcome him . . . When the disciples James and John saw this, they asked, "Lord, do you want us to call fire down from heaven to destroy them?" (Luke 9:53-54) These two disciples sincerely felt that their question made perfect sense in terms of what had transpired. But did Jesus answer, "Sure guys, let's nuke 'em"? Rather Jesus responded... "Of course not!" (Luke 9:55 The Message).
God cares deeply about us and hears every request, but that doesn't mean his answer can't still be "No." This becomes particularly clear to me when I think of my role as a father. Recall the many times you said “no” to your children as they grew up. . Many times they would ask for something, and your answer would be — for their sake — a firm and decisive “no”. More times than not, they didn’t have a clue as to why you answered “no”. Sometimes the desire was so great for whatever they wanted, they didn’t even hear your “no”. However, as they grew and matured their requests became more informed as they learned to apply the values by which they were raised.
So it is with our souls in relation to prayer. We often make requests that cannot be granted by God. But we can be assured that God's operative stance toward us is devotion to hearing us... even hearing and responding to our ridiculous and self-centered requests made in prayer with a No that is often mistaken for His silence.
Even when pain erupts and tragic events are allowed to continue, or God denies our requests, we can rest assured that we have been granted a greater blessing — or kept from a deeper, more lasting pain. We may not see evidence of this answer immediately, but in time we will. Faith, it’s all about trust and faith.
And God's “no” is seldom left to itself. The answer often goes further. When Paul repeatedly begged God to remove his "thorn in the flesh," the answer was "No." But there was more: "[God] said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness'" (2 Corinthians 12:9). The purpose behind God's refusal and the ramifications it holds for our life are met by the direct presence and power of God. The fullest sense of God's reply is "No, but I'm here . . . and it will be OK. Trust me." Yikes! That’s not easy to do is it?
Mistaken for Silence: Not Now, maybe later
But "No" is not the only response from God that can be mistaken for silence. Sometimes when he seems silent he is saying, "Not now." When we ask God for something, we are looking for it at once. We have a predetermined timetable. If God were to say, "Not now — the timing is neither right nor best for you," it would be natural to interpret his answer as silence.
What adds to the difficulty of "Not now" is that we are so used to instant gratification. We can't imagine a life without express lanes, ATMs, faxes, e-mail and instant messaging and the like. We're used to getting what we want when we want it, which makes "Later" or "Not now" only slightly easier to hear than "No." We still end up frowning don’t we?
But God's delay should not be confused with his denial, much less his silence. He always has reasons for saying "Not now," and we should greet such delays with trust and patience. The willingness to wait in prayer and let God's timetable unfold is an opportunity to grow spiritually. Besides, we may not be ready for what God would say. The delay may have less to do with the timing of events than the timing of our soul's growth. Waiting does not diminish us or our needs. Maybe our “needs” are not as important as we think they are. What is important, is continuous growth in our relationship with God. With God, there is “growing” in the waiting.
Mistaken for Silence: Deep Calling to Deep
A third response from God that can be mistaken for silence is the most difficult to grasp. Perhaps the best way to introduce it is through the words of Psalm 42:1-3... As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God . . . My tears have been my food day and night, while men say to me all day long, "Where is your God?"
Here is someone hungering for a word from God. He alludes to a difficult time, a season where he has been calling out to God in the midst of pain, grief or confusion. From all angles it appears as if God is silent to his cries. But notice what he goes on to write:
Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God . . . My soul is downcast within me; therefore I will remember you . . . Deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfalls. (Psalm 42:5-7)
The psalmist comes to see that there is no silence; the answer coming from God is deeper than words. God is present, and speaking, but what he's saying isn't resting on the surface waters of life. God’s answer is best found in the depths of wisdom and understanding that comes from being in His Holy Word, the Bible. There will be season’s in our lives where “deep is calling to deep” and you can only discover the answers and guidance of God from His written Word. Sometimes, what we think is His silence, is a call for us to put a little more skin in the game and search deep for wisdom and understanding... two things God sees we are lacking, but wants us to attain.
Perhaps it's not silence we're encountering while we seek God, but rather a lengthy pause — a prompting to engage in personal reflection so that the deepest of answers, the most profound of responses, can be given by Him, received by us and understood in the light of His perfect will.
Could this be how God mentors us? Is God's apparent silence the method of a Master Teacher? When we go through seasons where God's answers do not come quickly, instead of reacting negatively to what we perceive as no response, we need to consider the way God interacts with our prayers. He is most certainly seeking to draw us into deeper trust, dependence and obedience In that depth, we will find that the answers to our prayers radically transcend what we initially sought to find.
We are short sighted in our communication with God. We always will be, until we trust Him to answer in His way, in His time with our best interests, that we can rarely see woven into His response. Silence can be a true blessing, not simply for where it leads but for what it affords: opportunity for God to speak beyond the answers we seek.
This was certainly the experience of Jesus, who was led by the Holy Spirit into the desert to begin his ministry, and then led again into a personal desert to end His life on the cross. Jesus' cry from the cross... "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?" echos the separation that Jesus felt from the Father, as He took on the world's sin, but it also served as a "silent" reminder that Jesus was fulfilling a "deeper purpose." Jesus screamed in agony "God, where are you?" and God seemed to say nothing. But “deep was calling to deep”, and in His reconciling the world to Himself, Jesus heard the voice of God in the depths of his heart. He trusted and prevailed.
The voice of God in hearing us, caring for us and answering our prayers is assured. Trust that with all your heart. We communicate to God through prayer... He communicates to us through His Word. Read, Study and Listen to every word. Will it at times be a struggle... yes it will. Will you be anxious and frustrated... no doubt you will be.
Understand... God never responds in silence, but we have to listen carefully to how He responds to us. Search the depths of your soul... search His Word and you find all the answers to your prayers.
