Treacheries of the Heart… Evil and Wickedness… CHOICES you make!

As Christians, we often have a hard time discerning between an evil heart and an ordinary sinner who messes up, who isn’t perfect, yet because of weakness succumbs to sin.

I think one of the reasons we don’t “see” evil is because we find it so difficult to believe that evil individuals actually exist within the body of Christ -- the Church. We can’t imagine someone deceiving us with no conscience, hurting others with no remorse, spinning outrageous fabrications to ruin someone’s reputation, or pretending he or she is spiritually committed yet has no fear of God before his or her eyes.

The Bible clearly tells us that among God’s people there are wolves that wear sheep’s clothing (Jeremiah 23:14; Titus 1:10; Revelations 2:2). It’s true that every human heart is inclined toward sin (Romans 3:23), and that includes evil (Genesis 8:21; James 1:4). We all miss God’ mark of moral perfection. However, most ordinary sinners do not happily indulge evil urges, nor do we feel good about having them. We feel ashamed and guilty, rightly so (Romans 7:19–21). These things are not true of the evil heart.

You may be dealing with an evil heart right now in your spiritual life.  An evil heart is very different from an ordinary sinful heart.  Here are the differences, heavily supported by Scripture:

1. Evil hearts are experts at creating confusion and contention.

They twist the facts, mislead, distort, lie, avoid taking responsibility, deny reality, make up stories, and withhold information. (Psalms 5:8; 10:7; 58:3; 109:2–5; 140:2; Proverbs 6:13,14; 6:18,19; 12:13; 16:20; 16:27, 28; 30:14; Job 15:35; Jeremiah 18:18; Nehemiah 6:8; Micah 2:1; Matthew 12:34,35; Acts 6:11–13; 2 Peter 3:16)

2. Evil hearts are experts at fooling others with their smooth speech and flattering words.

But if you look at the fruit of their lives or the follow through of their words, you will find no real evidence of godly growth or change. It’s all smoke and mirrors. (Psalms 50:19; 52:2,3; 57:4; 59:7; 101:7; Proverbs 12:5; 26:23–26; 26:28; Job 20:12; Jeremiah 12:6; Matthew 26:59; Acts 6:11–13; Romans 16:17,18; 2 Corinthians 11:13,14; 2 Timothy 3:2–5; 3:13; Titus 1:10,16).

3. Evil hearts crave and demand control, and their highest authority is their own self-reference.

They reject feedback, real accountability, and make up their own rules to live by. They use Scripture to their own advantage but ignore and reject passages that might require self-correction and repentance. (Romans 2:8; Psalms 10; 36:1–4; 50:16–22; 54:5,6; 73:6–9; Proverbs 21:24; Jude 1:8–16).

4. Evil hearts play on the sympathies of good-willed people, often trumping the grace card.

They demand mercy but give none themselves. They demand warmth, forgiveness, and intimacy from those they have harmed with no empathy for the pain they have caused and no real intention of making amends or working hard to rebuild broken trust. (Proverbs 21:10; 1 Peter 2:16; Jude 1:4).

5. Evil hearts have no conscience, no remorse.

They do not struggle against sin or evil—they delight in it—all the while masquerading as someone of noble character. (Proverbs 2:14–15; 10:23; 12:10; 21:27,29; Isaiah 32:6; Romans 1:30; 2 Corinthians 11:13–15)

If you are working with someone who exhibits these characteristics, it’s important that you confront them head on. You must name evil for who and what it is. The longer you try to reason with such people or show mercy towards them, the more you, as the Christian, will become a pawn in his or her unholy game.

They want you to believe that:

1. Their horrible actions should have no serious or painful consequences.

When they say “I’m sorry,” they look to you as the elder-pastor or Christian counselor to be their advocate for amnesty with the person he or she has harmed. They believe grace means they are immediately granted immunity from the relational fallout of their serious sin. They believe forgiveness entitles them to full reconciliation and will pressure you and their victim to comply.

The Bible warns us saying, “But when grace is shown to the wicked, they do not learn righteousness; even in a land of uprightness they go on doing evil and do not regard the majesty of the Lord.” (Isaiah 26:10).

The Bible tells us that talking doesn’t wake up evil people, but painful consequences might. Jesus didn’t wake up the Pharisee’s with his talk nor did God’s counsel impact Cain (Genesis 4). In addition, the Bible shows us that when someone is truly sorry for the pain they have caused, he or she is eager to make amends to those they have harmed by their sin.  Consider the example of Zacchaeus’ and his response when he repented of his greed in Luke chapter 19.

Church leaders should not conspire with the evil one by turning attention to the victim, requiring the wounded person to forgive, to forget, to trust again when there has been no evidence of inner change on the part of the perpetrator. Proverbs says, “Trusting in a treacherous man in time of trouble is like a bad tooth or a foot that slips” (Proverbs. 25:19). It’s foolishness.

The evil person will also try to get you to believe:

2. That if I talk like a gospel-believing Christian I am one, even if my actions don’t line up with my talk.

Remember, Satan masquerades as an angel of light (2 Corinthians 11:13–15). He knows more true doctrine than you or I will ever know, but his heart is wicked. Why? Because although he knows the truth, he does not believe it or live by it.

The Bible has some strong words for those whose actions do not match their talk (1 John 3:17,18; Jeremiah 7:8,10; James 1:22, 26). John the Baptist said it best when he admonished the religious leaders, “Prove by the way you live that you have repented of your sins and turned to God” (Luke 3:8).

If week after week you hear the talk but there is no change in the walk, you have every reason to question someone’s relationship with God.

A major part of any Christians spiritual maturity, is that we have been trained to discern between good and evil. Why is that important? It’s important because evil usually pretends to be good, and without discernment we can be easily fooled (Hebrews 5:14).

When you confront evil, chances are good that the evil heart will stop fellowshipping with you because the darkness hates the light (John 3:20) and the foolish and evil heart reject correction (Proverbs 9:7,8). But that outcome is far better than allowing the evil heart to believe you are on his or her side, or that “he’s not that bad” or “that he’s really sorry” or “that he’s changing” when, in fact, he is not.

Daniel says, “The wicked will continue to be wicked” (Daniel 12:10), which begs the question, do you think an evil person can really change?

The Evil Among Us

I find this to be a convicting and uncomfortable truth: How we love others, particularly other Christians, reveals how we love God. The apostle John puts it bluntly: He who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen (1 John 4:20). Our love for each other is an indicator of the place God holds in our hearts.

God is very good at designing things so as to reveal our true heart: our faith is revealed by our works (James 2:18), our creeds are revealed by our deeds(Luke 6:46), and our love for him is revealed by our love for others. He makes it very hard for us to fake it.

Since the greatest and second greatest commandments are involved in these things (John 13:33-34), we know they are important to God. So perhaps the best thing we can do if we call ourselves Christian, is take an honest, lingering look at the way we treat others.  That brings us to the question of Evil and Wickedness.  We see evidence everyday of man’s evil towards others all around the world.  

Evil moves among us in a never-ending search for prey. Most of us believe we can protect ourselves because of our ability to tell the difference between good and evil. Sometimes, however, evil unsuspectingly creeps into our lives through the routine, the usual, the commonplace and even brought on by friends.

Maybe YOU have been the unfortunate prey, and the source of the attack on you is shocking and heart-breaking.  Why?  Because YOU are ravaged by a fellow Christian, someone you trusted completely.   How should we react to evil when it is perpetrated upon us by a “fellow Christian” someone we believe to be our brother or sister in Christ? 

The Christian is supposed to be defined by a special kind of love… the Christian loves Jesus Christ above everything else. This love is not an ordinary act of the will, as for instance when we decide to read a book or take a trip or attend a meeting or pay a visit to a friend. The dawning of Christ’s love is not something we conjure up ourselves. His love is grown in us by Him, by our obedient submission to everything He has commanded of us.  We love Jesus Christ only when we realize how much He loved us, to death on the Cross. We grow to love everything He loves, and He loves ALL His followers.

Galatians 6:2 says we should… Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.  As one would expect, this is a command not an option.

This is a verse of Scripture that is frequently quoted but almost never truly understood. The typical dealings of a local church with a victim of evil, or the perception of evil among believers, proves that this is the case. Let me explain.

Most all of us at one time or another have been touched by evil – by abuse of some type. In this discussion I am singling out “spiritual” abuse. An abuser, a fellow Christian, abused YOU. The abuser hated and hates YOU now. It was YOU who had to deal with the person, feeling vulnerable, beaten down and defenseless. It was YOU who had to expose the person, confront the person, report the person, protect yourself and your family from the person. YOU had to do all this, in a body where such things are not supposed to happen. YOU were the one who was there, among so-called Christians, and experienced the pain of “spiritual” abuse at the hand of another Christian.

And yet what happened when you went to a pastor or other fellow church members, for help? The following is likely what happened to you, because it happens all the time when one Christian abuses another Christian:

•  You heard your abuser excused or at least their sins minimized and marginalized.

•  You were told to follow Biblical counsel and go to the person and discuss your hurt (with the brazen abuser) knowing such a discussion is one-sided if not entirely impossible.

•  You heard people remind you that “you are a sinner too” (a lie by the way. The Christian is not perfect, but is no longer classed as a “sinner” by God)

•  You see people seem to show some empathy toward you, and yet they continued to associate with your abuser, as if the abuser did no wrong, and YOU were the problem.

•  While YOU could not tolerate being in the presence of your abuser without being re-traumatized, your fellow Christians continue on visiting with the person and often even attending church events and activities with the person as if nothing happened.

Such “friends” have failed to do what scripture says is the fulfillment of the Law of God. They have failed to truly extend genuine love toward you because they have failed to bear your burden. Why?

They failed because they think they know everything there is to know about “what God commands” of anyone and everyone. They think that they understand what you have gone through at the hands of the evil one. But they do not know. They do not understand. And really, they don’t want to. It is too troubling and unpleasant, and ignoring YOU And your abuse is easier than confronting it.  This is how “real sin” erodes a body of believers who struggle to live as Christians. 

If we are going to bear the burdens of victims of evil, then WE are going to have listen to them very, very closely. WE are going to have learn about how this kind of evil works. WE must walk in their shoes, in their steps, and do our best to understand just what it means to be THE target of abuse.

And until we understand that, we will fail to fulfill the Law of Christ. You will continue to have no real problem attending a church service with the victim’s oppressor. You will have no real trouble chatting with the abuser when you run into the person in the grocery store. Worse, you will piously preach at the victim – “Come on! Move on! Quit reflecting on the past. Forgive.” – and other such whitewashed trash talk.

I am puzzled.  Can someone tell me, why those who are comfortable in the presence of a wicked-oppressing-person feel no remorse at what the “evil person” has done?   Evil people who call themselves Christians are impervious to Biblical counsel and any attempts at one-on-one discussion to resolve in love an evil deed.  Why? Because the evil one is right and the abused one is wrong and no amount of discussion will change that!

Please tell me why “evil ones” are accepted and condoned in the family of God? How is it that anyone can truly understand the evil worked upon a victim (who YOU claim to “love”) and still be comfortable in the presence of that evil?  Scripture tells us clearly… “Purge the evil person from among you.” (1 Corinthians 5:13 ESV; 1 Corinthians 5:2 ESV)

Let me answer for you – you cannot. You do not. And until you do, you are failing to fulfill the Law of Christ. You are not loving the widows and orphans… or anyone else among the body of Christ.

And God sees it all… and remembers.

STOP HATING YOUR CHURCH!

Article by David Santistevan -  Worship Pastor at Allison Park Church in Pittsburg PA

Church is imperfect. Leaders are imperfect. You are imperfect.
And it’s really time to get over the backbiting, the bickering and the slandering of your church. I have a better idea: What if you decided to love it?

I remember when a friend was struggling in his marriage. The feelings weren’t there. They were fighting often. Tension was high and romance was low. Do you know what turned it around? He decided to love her. He decided to appreciate her. He made a decision to romance. He learned that what you invest in, grows. What you appreciate, appreciates.

My wife had to stay home with our sick daughter this weekend. But Tyler came with me Saturday and Sunday. He hung out for all 8,000 rehearsals. We sang together. We talked to people together.
I’m glad he can grow up in a church. Not a perfect church. But a church, nonetheless.

To Press In or Withdraw?

Here’s what I’ve noticed in my own life: When I’m closest with Jesus, the less I criticize and find fault in every environment and leader around me. It’s because my attitude is in check with the Holy Spirit. It’s because I’m in a good place of humility, dependence and pouring my life out for the Gospel.

Of course, I don’t agree with everything. Of course, imperfect people lead me, pray for me, preach to me and lead worship. But I’m more inclined to give them the benefit of the doubt when my heart is submitted. Rather than defaulting to criticism, I pray for them, understand the struggle of ministry and stay focused on the right things.

But when I wander, when I try to live in my own strength, I start to get offended and hurt by every little thing. Rather than attending my local church out of obedience to God and a commitment to the Kingdom, I’m only concerned with how I’m served and treated.

Should I press in to the church or withdraw? I’d rather have a bias of pressing in. Of being who God has called me to be. Of loving what Jesus has chosen to love.

Worship Leaders, let’s develop a culture of musicians who are into Jesus and committed to the local church, not just the opportunity to be on a stage.

Let’s stop being nit picky about little things, and instead be leaders. Leaders who make change happen. Leaders who lead with a bias toward action and a good attitude.

The Critic's Choice!

Have you ever been on the receiving end of a tongue lashing by someone you thought was a colleague, a friend or maybe even a fellow Christian?  Maybe you did something, well meaning, and your friend decided to critique everything you did, or maybe it was more of a bashing that left you feeling humiliated and afraid to ever do anything like what you did for fear it the critic would return with more for the same.

Criticism in personal relationships starts out low-key but almost always escalates over time.  It happens once, then twice and since your reaction is probably defensive and maybe even cowering, the experience is negative and begins building a downward spiral of resentment. The criticized person feels controlled, which satisfies the critical partner, who then steps up the criticism, increasing the other’s sense of being controlled, and so on.

At no time in this downward spiral does an obvious fact occur to the critical person… Criticism is an utter failure at getting positive behavior change. Any short-term gain you might get from it builds resentment down the line.  It has a chilling affect on friendships and trust.

Criticism fails because it embodies two of the things that human beings don’t appreciate: 1. It calls for submission, and we don’t like to submit. 2. ]It devalues, and we don’t like to feel devalued.

While people don’t like to submit, we actually do want to cooperate, even with a person delivering unfair criticism. Critical people seem oblivious to this key point about human nature. The valued self cooperates; the devalued self resists. If you want behavior change from a partner, a child, relative, or friend, first show value for the person.  Build the person up with legitimate compliments.  If you want resistance, criticize, tear them down, make them beef worthless and inadequate.

Critical people are certainly smart enough to figure out that criticism doesn’t work. So why do they keep doing it, even in the face of mounting frustration from the person they are critiquing? It's because criticism is an easy form of ego gratification. We don’t criticize because we so much disagree with a behavior or an attitude. We criticize because we somehow feel devalued by the behavior or attitude of the person we decide needs to be criticized. Critical people tend to be easily insulted and especially in need of ego gratification, which is essentially a way to preemptively defend themselves.  In-other-words, beat the other person senseless with your criticism and you walk away feeling terrific.

  

Criticism is defined as “the act of criticizing usually unfavorably.” (merriam-webster.com) I think this definition is one of the better ones. Most of the time criticism is a negative thing but constructive criticism can be a positive outlet to build someone up while still helping them through some flaws, mistakes or weaknesses they may have. 

Whether you criticize in a negative or positive way, the main thing to remember is that YOU have the choice to decide how you will criticize. What does the Bible say about criticism? Maybe Christians would do well to consider the Bible’s wisdom and just maybe interpersonal relationships in the Church would dramatically improve.

Any kind of negative criticism is unnecessary and foolish.  Consider these words…“Be not rash with your mouth, nor let your heart be hasty to utter a word before God, for God is in Heaven and you are on earth. Therefore let your words be few. For a dream comes with much business, and a fool’s voice with many words.” (Ecclesiastes 5:2-3)

As the scripture says, a fool has many things to say, clearly most of it unnecessary. People who are negative have an issue with personal pride. They think they are better and smarter than you and by how they talk down at you makes them feel good and it puffs up their oversized ego. Their comments aren’t there to help you; they are there to make you feel inadequate and inferior. When they make you feel that way, they feel superior and that is where all of their critical negativity festers from. They have a drive to overpower you. God is always with the humble and anyone who continues in this negative lifestyle is in trouble… “The fear of the Lord is the hatred of evil. Pride and arrogance and the way of evil and perverted speech I hate!” (Proverbs 8:13)

Constructive criticism will only work on someone who wants to become wise and learn. “Do not reprove a scoffer, or he will hate you; reprove a wise man, and he will love you.” (Proverbs 9:8)   To the fool this will only make him lash out more, mostly because of his own insecurity that you are right about something he actually feels very insecure about. 

Fools love to make you feel inferior and inadequate.  They hate it when others make them feel the same way they are trying to make the person they criticize feel. This is the key. A fool thinks you make them look dumb when you correct them.  A wise person thinks that you are right and therefore will increase in learning and become a little bit wiser because of it. A fool will not care what you have to say in defense or rebuttal of an unfair criticism. In Christian community, we still love them and be kind to them, but don’t spend much time trying to persuade change.  Any change can only come from a transformed attitude and heart.

Humans are really not very well equipped to criticize their fellow man.  The tendency to justify our attitudes and actions make us vulnerable to the sin of pride.  So we might ask the question… How Does God Criticize?

God is very critical of us because we have an issue called sin, which His own Son, Jesus, died for. Sin is no joke to God and He will be critical of us when such sins as pride interfere with our loving relationships with one another.

In the book of Job you will see a conversation take place between Job and three of his so-called “friends”. The whole dialogue in a general sense consists of the friends berating Job and Job defending himself while complaining and wishing he was dead. Near the end God steps in with a lengthy discourse on how unworthy and unwise they all are. He starts it off by saying, “Who is this that darkens My counsel by words without knowledge? Dress for action like a man; I will question you, and you make it known to Me.” (Job 38:2-3) 

God’s entire discourse criticizes the men’s own intellect and power which is pitifully insignificant in the presence of God. God is a God of love, but also exacting justice, fairness and even wrath. He is a jealous God and He will criticize every single sin you’ve made if you die without Jesus as your savior. 

However, God will gladly give us wisdom and critique us in a positive way if we will only listen to His Words.  God’s reproof leads to life, but only the wise man will hear it and obey.  “The ear that listens to life-giving reproof will dwell among the wise.” (Proverbs 15:31)  And the wisest decision you will ever make while you are alive is choosing to obey God and accept Jesus as your Savior for the remission of your sins.

Criticism is to your relationships what smoking is to your health. If you’re a critical person, you must absolutely get a handle on your impulse to criticize others, before it ruins your relationships.  Smoking can kill the body… criticism is the root of all sorts of sin that can destroy the soul. 

Criticism is all about attitude… yours. You can criticize others to make yourself feel good and diminish the other person. Or, you can constructively suggest things and ways that can help them become better people and maybe more skilled at the task you are bent to criticize. You have to want to help others, you have to care about their feelings, if you are going to critique them in a positive way. 

So, make the choice today! Be positive! And if you are still wandering through life without a Savior, please consider seeking Jesus today! May God bless you as you continue to live a life worthy of the calling!

June 4th - Pentecost Sunday

On Pentecost Sunday, Christians celebrate the ascension of Jesus Christ and the blessing of the Holy Spirit upon his apostles. It is the day when God sent the promised Helper... The Holy Spirit, descending upon the gathered disciples of Jesus Christ, taking on the form of rushing wind and tongues of fire, which separated to settle on each one of them. 

Christians today remember that momentous day not just as a manifestation of the Holy Spirit upon the disciples of Jesus Christ, but also as an event signifying the birth of His Church. It is from that day that the Apostles were fully equipped to go forth and spread the message of Jesus and preach the Gospel to the ends of the earth. 

John the Baptist prophesied of the first Pentecost when Jesus would baptize with the Holy Spirit and with fire (Matthew 3:11). Jesus confirmed this prophecy with the promise of the Holy Spirit to the disciples in John 14:26. He showed Himself to these men after His death on the cross and His resurrection, giving convincing proofs that He was alive and truly the Son of God. 

Jesus told the disciples to wait in Jerusalem for the Father’s gift of the Holy Spirit, from whom they would receive power to be His witnesses to the ends of the earth (Acts 1:3-8). 

After Jesus’ ascension to heaven, the men returned to Jerusalem and joined together in prayer in an upper room. On the Day of Pentecost, just as promised, the sound of a violent wind filled the house and tongues of fire came to rest on each of them and all were filled with the Holy Spirit. They were given the power of communication, which Peter used to begin the ministry for which Jesus had prepared him. After the coming of the Holy Spirit, the disciples did not stay in the room basking in God’s glory but burst forth to tell the world. This was the beginning of the Church as we know it.

The celebration of Pentecost Sunday reminds us of the reality that we all have the unifying Spirit that was poured out upon the first-century church as described in Acts 2:1-4. It is a reminder that we are co-heirs with Christ, to suffer with Him that we may also be glorified with Him; that the manifestation of the Spirit is given for the common good (1 Corinthians 12:7); that we are all baptized by one Spirit into one body (1 Corinthians 12:13); and that the Spirit which raised Jesus from the dead lives inside believers (Romans 8:9-11). 

This gift of the Holy Spirit that was promised and given to all believers on the first Pentecost is promised for you and your children and for all who are far off whom the Lord our God will call (Acts 2:39).

Honor Mom Every Day of your Life

May all Mothers everywhere enjoy the honor shown to you on your special day of Mother’s Day and everyday of your life.  Its a day when family, sons and daughters, pay extra special attention to you!

Honoring our Mom is not just a day for cards, brunch and family togetherness, its to be a way of life for those who love the Lord. The fifth commandment admonishes all who profess to know the Lord… to honor our mothers and [fathers] every day of our lives.

Proverbs is a book based on metaphor. It is packed with word-pictures of universal truths. Throughout Proverbs, wisdom is anthropomorphized  as a woman. As early as Proverbs 1:20, wisdom is compared to a woman who shouts in the streets, chastising fools and scoffers. Proverbs 31 provides a detailed metaphor of feminine wisdom in the context of a family and a community.

The most quoted section, verses 10–31, is a chiastic poem, that is, a poem that cycles through repeated thoughts in a particular order. The chapter speaks of the worth of a good wife to her husband, the manual labor that she does, her fulfillment of responsibilities to those who need her, her ability to provide for her family, and her wisdom in caring for herself so she can share her strength with others. These ideas are presented in a kind of circular pattern throughout the section.

The chapter begins with King Lemuel recounting advice his mother had given him. She exhorted him to not fall to weaknesses that would compromise his position as king, but to care for the poor. One of the weaknesses the king’s mother mentioned was the susceptibility of his strength—or “noble character” (31:10)—to be harmed by improper relationships with women. Although verses 10-31 do not directly follow this warning in the original, they do illustrate a fitting description of what kind of woman Lemuel should seek.

   ¹⁰An excellent wife, who can find?

       For her worth is far above jewels. 

   ¹¹The heart of her husband trusts in her,

       And he will have no lack of gain. 

   ¹²She does him good and not evil

       All the days of her life. 

A good, supportive, trusting wife is a blessing to a man. A woman who partners with her husband, who is reliable and looks out for his interests, gives a man a security that is greatly lacking in the world. She is worth more than a substantial paycheck. To bring in the metaphor, wisdom provides the same benefits—it is worth more than money, you can always trust it to make the right decision, and it provides blessings for those who have it.

   ¹³She looks for wool and flax,

       And works with her hands in delight…

   ¹⁹She stretches out her hands to the distaff,

       And her hands grasp the spindle…

   ²⁷She looks well to the ways of her household,

       And does not eat the bread of idleness. 

The wife of Proverbs 31 isn’t afraid of work. She gets up in the morning and gets things done. In the time of Solomon, this involved making fabric and sewing clothes, but verse 27 certainly applies directly to us today—taking care of our responsibilities is a characteristic of wisdom.

   ¹⁵She rises also while it is still night

       And gives food to her household

       And portions to her maidens…

   ²¹She is not afraid of the snow for her household,

       For all her household are clothed with scarlet.

   ²⁰She extends her hand to the poor,

       And she stretches out her hands to the needy.

Another characteristic of wisdom is the grace to help others. The Proverbs 31 wife ensures that those under her care receive what they need—food, clothing, protection. And she is able to serve others out of the excess of her work and the leaning of her heart. She has so internalized her role as a provider that it extends past her immediate responsibilities and into the community.

   ¹⁴She is like merchant ships;

       She brings her food from afar…

   ¹⁶She considers a field and buys it;

       From her earnings she plants a vineyard…

   ¹⁸She senses that her gain is good;

       Her lamp does not go out at night…

   ²⁴She makes linen garments and sells them,

       And supplies belts to the tradesmen.

Beyond that, she’s savvy. She’s educated about the world and the world of business. She knows how to use her skills to provide for her family, and she’s not afraid to go interact with that world, whether it be as a merchant or a buyer. She knows how to use her strengths to her best advantage, and she fully realizes how valuable her efforts are.

   ¹⁷She girds herself with strength

       And makes her arms strong…

   ²²She makes coverings for herself;

       Her clothing is fine linen and purple.

   ²⁵Strength and dignity are her clothing,

       And she smiles at the future.

   ²⁶She opens her mouth in wisdom,

       And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.

The Proverbs 31 woman not only knows her worth, she knows her responsibilities to herself. She would not be able to provide for others if she neglected her needs—both physical and spiritual. She makes sure her appearance reflects her respected position as an influence in her community. Her greatest strength is her wisdom—her accurate judgment about the world and her influence in it. And she is quick to share the wisdom she has gained to encourage others to reach their potential.

   ²³Her husband is known in the gates,

       When he sits among the elders of the land… 

   ²⁸Her children rise up and bless her;

       Her husband also, and he praises her, saying: 

   ²⁹"Many daughters have done nobly,

       But you excel them all." 

   ³⁰Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain,

       But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised. 

   ³¹Give her the product of her hands,

       And let her works praise her in the gates.

She knows that, as a partner in her marriage, she has a tremendous influence on her husband’s ministry. She can integrate her life—both domestic and professional—with her ministry in such a way that her husband has the freedom to serve. In fact, her reputation is so established, that it bleeds off onto him.

The Proverbs 31 wife is a fierce provider and protector for those she cares about. She is wise to the ways of the world, but lives by the wisdom of God. As in the rest of the Proverbs, these specific examples provide a metaphor for the larger truth. How any individual woman exemplifies these characteristics will depend on her situation, gifts, and abilities. The key is in verse 30, just as it is in the beginning of Proverbs, in 1:7:  But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.

Enjoy your Mother on Mother’s Day… and remember, honoring her every day is a way of life for those who profess Christ.

Change your Attitude about the Church

The vehicle through which the Eternal Purpose of God is being established in the earth until Christ's return is the local Church.  Remember, the church is people, not a building structure.   His followers in assembly and fellowship make up what is the church.  What does this mean for sincere and passionate followers of Christ?   It means we have to consider the local Church as our first priority, because it is [we are] God's primary focus on earth through which he is working out his plan for mankind (Ephesians 1:10-11; 3:10-11, Hebrews 13:20-21).   Acknowledging that reality suggests we ought to learn to "be the church" in God's way.

Sometimes due to ignorance about the Word of God, or cultural thinking that says "I pick and choose where I go to church", or other factors like choosing a church because of what "it has to offer me" in the form of programs and departments, it can be easy to get caught up in a consumer's view of church. 

It seems that the standard model of “doing church” in America today is primarily attractional rather than incarnational. It means this: “If we get our media right, our preaching right, our seating and our parking right… if we offer great children’s programs and a rocking worship band people will come. If we offer something for every member of the family then families will flock to our church. If we do all this and more, and we market it right, people will come and we will be successful.“   So, what’s the problem with that concept?  

For starters, that’s not how Jesus wants his body of believers to work.  Let’s go back to an important beginning point to see if we can get a sense of what’s wrong with the “consumers attitude” when it comes to the body of Christ.

It's was no accident that Jesus used the trade of fishing when he told his disciples that he would make them "fishers of men."  He created the analogy to portray how the church would be stocked with followers.  His analogy embodies every aspect of preaching the gospel... in the same manner that you go fishing for real fish in the sea, with blood, sweat and tears and all that you have, so you will also go fishing for real people in the world.  

Jesus,  not only gave the promise, "I will make you fishers of men" (Matt. 4:19), but also reinforced the analogy with word-pictures of what this endeavor would look like.  In Matthew 13:47-50, Jesus tells a parable of what the Kingdom of Heaven is like. It's like a net being cast into the sea, gathering up fish of every kind. In essence, Jesus is saying that the Kingdom of Heaven is like going fishing. And when you fish, Jesus says, you bring in all kinds of fish.  Some are desirable and edible, some are not.  At the end of the day, when the job's done and you’re back on shore, you can separate the catch accordingly. Until then, the "fishermen"  all stay in the boat together and keep on fishing. There's no use in trying to separate the good from the bad while you're still out fishing.  As words in the ol' song the Gambler say, "You never count your money when you're sittin' at the table [playing cards for money]. There'll be time enough for countin' when the dealing's done."

What do we learn from Jesus analogy?  Good fish and bad fish swim into the same nets.  We preach the gospel to all people.  That means the Church will exist in an environment of tension where there are believers and unbelievers hanging out under the same roof.  For a variety of reasons they are part of the body of Christ, for now. It's a messy job.  It can be a battle ground.  Furthermore, there's no fool-proof technique to minister to both groups in equal portions, at the same time, all the time.  Remember, there will be people active in the body of Christ who never fully embrace what God expects of them.  For now, that makes little difference to God... they’re living among us in Christian community, calling themselves Christians and thinking they are doing what God wants them to be doing.  Separating the “catch” when the time comes is God’s business not ours.

There is a lot of clutter that can come from loving and serving Christians and psuedo-Christians alike.  It’s for that reason that the “consumers mentality” has crept into the workings of the body of Christ.   

It’s striking that the Bible never measures a church’s maturity or strength or power or health or success by 1) it’s music, 2) it’s gifts, 3) it’s preacher, 4) it’s size, 5) what kind of ministries it offers or 6) it’s building.  The Bible measures a church’s maturity by the way all God’s people are being equipped to serve.  That preparation delivered in the forms of preaching and teaching, should stimulate real action on the part of those equipped... by visible demonstrations of their love for the Lord by serving Him in a variety of ways, mostly by being personally engaged in preaching the gospel to the unsaved.  

If you will take time to read Ephesians 4:12-14 we’re reminded that there are two kinds of church communities ‘we’ are building.  I use the word ‘we’ because the kind of church community ‘we’ become depends on each one of us.  We read that the role of the pastor/teacher is to ¹²to equip the saints (believers) for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ (church), ¹³until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ, ¹⁴so that we may no longer be children, tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes.

You’ll notice that a church’s maturity, growth and success depends not just on believers being equipped for ministry, but believers carrying out the work of ministry.  In fact the maturity of a church is directly proportional to the extent to which believers are equipped for evangelism and serving others.   

And its precisely for this reason that we must all look within ourselves, constantly checking our expectations and motives against the standards God has set for us personally and in Christian community.   When people find themselves unhappy with their church, frustrated by what it is or isn’t giving, what it lacks, what it needs to change... it’s important to remember that ‘you’ are the church.   When you complain about the church, remember that you are part of the body.  You are part of the ‘problem’ family.  

So the solution lies first and foremost with us as believers.  And our “attitudes” about what church is supposed to be will ultimately reveal who we are... a real believer with Christ as our focus, or a psuedo-believer with our expectations, wants and needs at the forefront.  That's the essence of the "two" groups (churches) that exist within the body of Christ.

The great tragedy is that too many believers come to a church looking for the wrong things, because too many believers have a consumer view of church.  The consumers view is always about what “church” can give me, what it offers me, what it can do for me, how it can benefit me, what it can do for my children … the expectations are endless and always flawed.  

It’s a parasitic view of church that feeds a therapeutic faith. It’s the reason why the moment things don’t go your way, the moment your ego is bruised, the moment your needs are not met, the moment things no longer suit your lifestyle, the moment you don’t get anything out of the service, the moment things require commitment, you bail or look for another community you can feed off.  Your faith is centered not in God, but in the things you get from church that make you feel good and satisfy your needs.

Here is the reality for many believers in their approach to church: I am here to feed off you, not to help you thrive or grow with you. Imagine approaching your personal relationships this way.  Not only would it be unacceptable, it would be repulsive.  The greater tragedy is that when we approach church in this way, we don’t come to make Jesus our focus and treasure, and neither do we come to make him the treasure of others, we come to be treasured and to align with those who have the same attitude.   Such consumer minded Christians want to be the center of focus and attention, with their needs always preeminent.  

If you’re coming to the realization that you might be thinking the way I’ve described, then you need to seriously change your views.  Repentance is clearly an important first step in transforming your mind. Such a self-focused attitude, seeing the church as nothing more than a dispenser of services, steals God’s glory and replaces his worth with your own.  It’s not about you.  Jesus is the head, we are the parts, being equipped for the work of ministry, so that as we carry out the work of ministry, so that we might together grow to maturity in Christ.   

God has saved you, redeemed you, forgiven you, adopted you into a community for the purpose of equipping you for the work of ministry and service so that together with others, Jesus might be our focus and shared treasure, to his praise and our joy.  Do church His way.  Love the church, the people of God, because you love Jesus more than anything else.

That’s what makes a ‘great’ church.  Not a perfect one, but a great one because our God is great and we love Him more than anything else in our lives.  It starts with YOU.  The right attitude really does determine your altitude... heaven, or not.